I Hate Spiders.

Actually, that’s an understatement.

I’ve only ever had one recurring dream in my life and both times the dream left me screaming and bolting out of my bed to find safety.

What was this dream?  Oh… that my life was covered in spiders.

I don’t hate spiders.  I abhor them.

 

**

 

This evening I was happily organizing the art supplies at Sunshine Studios and getting ready for tomorrow morning’s class when out of the corner of my eye I see him, Mister Freakishly Huge and Hairy Scary Man Eating Spider.  Oh and where exactly was Mister Freakishly Huge and Hairy Scary Man Eating Spider?  Not up in the corner like a good little man eating demon… no, no, he was nonchalantly sitting on the edge where the wall meets the floor–approximately four inches from my hand.

Panic is another understatement.

I speedily fled the room leaving him with my computer and my fan (two of my most beloved belongings) and called Tracy who was studying with our Thai tutor.

Our Thai teacher was able to quickly disembody the nasty demon but with no lack of high pitched screaming and award winning high jumps from me.

 

Needless to say,

 

Mister Freakishly Huge and Hairy Scary Man Eating Spider: 1

Samara: -3 (negative points for lack of dignity)

 

 

 

*The whole time this was happening I was believing the spider to be a tarantula, as I’ve never seen a spider so big and so hairy before… My Thai teacher kept referring to the spiders as a แมงมุมยักศ์ which literally translated means: giant (as in ogre…) spider.  I googled it in Thai to see if it was actually the Thai name for a species of spiders (like ‘tarantula’) or just an adjective.

Turns out, it was just an adjective and Mister Freakishly Huge and Hairy Scary Man Eating Spider was not a tarantula, but a very well fed huntsman spider.

As I was in no state of mind to snap a photo of him for you all, this is the closest images I could find:

 

 

Well, for whatever reason the pictures aren’t loading properly, and since they’re really gross and I don’t know how badly I even want these pictures on my blog… you can just do your own google image search of ‘thai huntsman spiders’.

 

**Note:  Throwing up is an appropriate and acceptable response.

 

***For more of how I feel about spiders you can go here and then here.

 

****UPDATE****

The next morning I had to teach classes at Sunshine Studios so I literally opened the building up and made one of my students do a thorough search of the rooms before I would enter in.   There have, thankfully, been no new intruders since.

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9 Comments

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9 responses to “I Hate Spiders.

  1. Ashleigh

    No….way! That’s disgusting! I’m not even a major hater of spiders but that’s so gross. I got chills when I saw the pics!

  2. Sarah

    I love you lack of love for spiders and love for loofahs! And thoroughly enjoy these blogs.

  3. gramma Sharon

    I googled the Huntsman spider ….it was listed as a monster spider first found in Laos & now all over the world … momma spider lays over 200 eggs & if guarding her eggs she is very aggressive …the bite is not fatal to humans but the bite is very painful and can give bad headaches & cause vomiting… it was good to find & dismember this before you and the children happen on it while at Sunshine Studios & tic the thing off … name of Jesus is over all creeping things too … PTL for the power of His name!!!,..

  4. your descriptions are great,
    an unfortunate subject matter,
    but you make me laugh:)

  5. Paul

    I think you should acquire a Thai huntsman spider and keep it as a pet in an aquarium in your room. You could come to an understanding with the spiders and turn enemies into friends. That way you wouldn’t be so likely to react in fear and loathing when a spider makes an appearance.

  6. Lovely Rita

    I feel the same way about snakes. I literally want to vomit when I see them. I totally get what you are saying about spiders. And if I hadn’t grown up in Oklahoma, where tarantulas magically sprout out of the ground at a moment’s notice, I would absolutely feel the same way about spiders too!! I think you should give yourself at least 2pts for getting close enough to take a picture, even if it WAS dead!!

  7. Scott McIntyre

    I hate spiders too 😉 Every spring I go on a cleaning spree through the house killing, killing, killing…it’s a massacre. I use to have a praying mantis in an insect barn that I use to feed spiders to, but then I ran out of spiders 😉 Use to call it the Thunder Dome. Just ask Jane about it.

    • samara marie

      Honestly, I hate praying mantises MORE than I hate spiders. I had a traumatic experience that has literally scarred me for life.

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